Today was a tough mom day. Well, let me clarify that a bit. Today for the most part, was actually a pretty good day. I worked out, had lunch with a friend, and ran some errands. Yes, today was a good day-until dinner time when my good day came to a screeching halt.
During our delicious meal of beloved tacos (classy, I know), our conversation turned to relationships. It was during this time that my 17-year-old (soon to be an adult, out in the world on his own) told me that he thinks, and I quote, “respect is overrated”. The sad thing is, he is drop dead serious in this opinion. He thinks I’m living old-school when I say women (and people in general) should be respected. When I told him my opinion on respecting women he responded with, “well I think I should be respected”. I sat there dumbfounded at where he came up with this nonsense. Silly me, I know exactly where he got it-from media and popular social opinion. His dad and I certainly never taught him any of that nonsense, that’s for sure! After 26 years, my husband still opens the car door for me and that’s the way it should be, for Pete’s sake! If that makes us old-school then I certainly never want to be new-school.
So that was bad, but he’s been known to spout off his ridiculously progressive teenage opinions from time to time, so I was able to shake my head and blow it off. Well, blow it off as best I could. I am a mom after all, and of course tend to blame myself for every wayward idea or action my children have.
But then came the ride to youth group with my 13-year-old who proceeded to remind me how, “dad is the fun one”, and how, “dad works harder than I do for our family because he has a JOB”. Oooh, I think the smoke was literally coming out of my ears on that comment. I quickly reminded him that his dad and I both work very hard for the family but just in different ways. He disagreed completely of course, and we spent the rest of the car ride in silence.
So that was it. Just like that, day ruined.
Ok I know, these may seem like small issues in the big grand scheme of life. I get it. But they are really big to me. Like I said before, this is my job and I take it very personally. After all, God entrusted these kids to me to shape and mold in preparation to send them out into the world, and love the world as He loved us. When my kids say things like they did today, I feel like I have completely failed at the one job I’ve been given. I know it isn’t really as dire as that, but some days I just worry about the people I’ve brought up, who will soon be independent, active members of society.
We mothers have one of the most thankless jobs in the world. That is, if it’s even really considered a job (I’m being sarcastic, of course). Every day we tirelessly give ourselves fully-physically and emotionally to our family’s wellbeing. We may not get a paycheck. Heck, we usually don’t even get a thank you. And although we may get thrown up on, yelled at, and disrespected, we are always there and show up ready for each new day.
But believe it or not, despite it all I still consider being a mom one of the best jobs in the world. Perhaps I’m just a glutton for punishment, I don’t know. I do miss the days when the kids were young and would hold my hand. The days when they would look up at me with their big, bright eyes beaming with so much love that would just fill up my heart. I suppose when I’m having a bad mom day, or even just a bad mom evening, I need to remember those precious times. I need to take a step back and remind myself that it will all be ok. That, while God has entrusted these little ones to me, He also has a plan for them. He gave each of them to me knowing that I would be perfect for them, even when I fear I am not. God is allowing me to plant the seeds and He will produce the fruit.
So, here’s to all you weary moms out there (myself included). Your job is not one that is paid because no one could put a price tag on what you do. You are valuable. You are important. And although it may not seem like it at times, you are loved.
Tomorrow’s a new day.
So give yourself a big pat on the back, and carry on.
You’ve got this, and so do I…I think. 😉